A woman on Reddit says her self-esteem is shattered after she learned her boyfriend of four years used to bad-mouth her appearance to his friends when they first met.
The woman explained on Reddit that she recently “checked his phone and found old group chat messages where he told his friends that he’s meeting up with the ugly chick tonight.”
“This is when we were still in the early talking stages and they asked him which one and he sent them my Instagram picture and my nickname is Buggie. I searched ‘buggie’ in the messages and a bunch of message threads came up of my BF calling me ugly and I’m one of the ugliest girls he has ever dated but he had to settle for me,” she shared.
“He made comments about ‘why are all the fat ones so nice but all the baddies are so rude.’ His friends and him made a lot of jokes about me being 200 pounds and my BF never defended me and he just put laughing emojis,” the devastated woman continued.
Her boyfriend finally stopped making negative comments about her appearance when they started officially dating and became serious.
“He hasn’t been active in that group chat since. But this still hurt my feelings so much. I brought this up to him and he turned it back on me saying how dare I go through a man’s phone but he apologized and said he was immature back then and how it was just boys just being boys,” she wrote on the forum.
Her boyfriend also admitted that, at the time, he didn’t find her attractive due to her weight, but that over time he “grew to find [her] personality beautiful even though [she’s] not.”
“I’m just even more insecure now than I [have] ever been before. I don’t even take off my clothes when we’re having sex and I lock the bathroom door when I’m taking a shower. I feel so insecure to even let him see me naked because I’m not a perfect size 2 and I’ve never been a small woman,” she concluded.
In the comments section, users tried to comfort the woman and blasted her boyfriend for being ugly on the inside.
“I’m baffled you can continue to have sex with him after hearing his response. That’s crazy to me. No, you shouldn’t let it go. His present day response should have told you that this is not all in the past,” one person wrote.
“Who says you need to let this go? He was AWFUL. You got a glimpse into what he’s like and who he is deep down when other people aren’t around and it was UGLY. HE was ugly. You don’t need to force yourself to settle for someone like that. It’d be one thing if he was horrified and on his knees begging for forgiveness, trying any and everything to restore your trust and self-esteem. But he’s not. He’s just as callous as he ever was. Don’t settle for this a–hole. You can do WAY better,” another chimed in.
“To be honest, I would be unable to move forward after this. I know this sub is quick to say ‘break up,’ but this just feels like a huge betrayal … It also shows he is a moron. I would just end this before you hurt yourself more. You deserve someone who finds you hot and beautiful. And I’m sure you will find them,” someone else commented.
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Gallery Credit: Michele Bird