Meanwhile, others disagreed and pointed out that the role of the parents in a wedding is not merely a generational thing, but can be a cultural one as well.
“This is a tricky question, because of cultural expectations and nuance,” busyshrew said.
“You mention a lot of family coming from overseas. This is a BIG expense and hassle for many of them, and if they know your parents are paying for the meal, they may very well judge your PARENTS for being bad hosts. And then it’s your mom and dad that get the flack. Not you. And that’s kinda not fair,” they continued.
“Normally, if a bride and groom are hosting their own wedding and most people are local (i.e. North American), then I would say not the asshole and go ahead. As you say, it’s one meal, and vegetarian food is delicious, too. BUT, if you are layering different cultural traditions and norms on top, plus the fact that your parents are paying for part of your wedding, then I would gently suggest that you consider compromising. You mention that you are easygoing about your vegetarianism, so why make this a hill to die on?” they added.
“If you really want to have everything exactly your way, then pay for the entire wedding yourself, and that way your parents can’t be blamed,” they advised.