A man on Reddit is contemplating disinviting his family from his upcoming wedding due to them continuously “insulting” his fiancée. The man, who was married once before, is fuming because his family won’t stop calling his future-bride his “second wife.”
“Years ago, I was married to a close friend. We were roommates, adopted a dog together, and lived together since college until our mid/late twenties (married at 24 and 25). However, we were never actually romantically involved. She was not interested in marriage and also questioned her sexuality at the time, but her family was ultra-traditional (and messy for many other reasons) and kept pushing for her to ‘settle down,'” he explained.
“I had just gotten out of a rough long term relationship, and we kind of just both said f–k it, we basically were kind of living like a married couple,” the groom-to-be continued on Reddit, adding they got married out of “convenience.”
He and his ex-wife didn’t have a wedding ceremony and never consummated their marriage, either. His family knew she wasn’t his wife in the “traditional sense” and “heavily disapproved” of the two marrying.
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“When I started getting back into the dating scene, we split up and legally divorced. She remains one of my close friends to this very day, and I care for her a lot. It’s been a few years, and I am now 32 with a lovely fiancée who I cannot wait to marry,” he continued.
However, since announcing his engagement, his family has been making “weird comments” about his relationship, calling his fiancée his “second wife” and making fun of him getting married twice by the age of 32.
“It makes both me and my fiancée uncomfortable. I keep on saying that my close friend wasn’t really my wife in the traditional sense, but my family brushes me off by saying that they’re just joking, or she’s technically my second wife anyway so it’s not like they’re wrong,” he detailed.
Reaching his breaking point, the man eventually blew up at his family, calling them “disrespectful” and “rude for belittling” his relationship.
“My mom and my sister both said that if I didn’t want to hear these statements, I shouldn’t have married my close friend. I threatened to not invite them to the wedding, and now things are super tense,” he concluded.
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Users in the comments rallied behind the man, with many slamming his family for not respecting his relationship and decisions.
“Holy s–t, what is wrong with your family? It’s none of their goddamn business who you were married to before, especially when it wasn’t even a romantic relationship. Calling your fiancée your ‘second wife’ is disrespectful and insensitive. Your blow up was justified, and if they can’t respect your boundaries, they don’t deserve to be at your wedding. Stick to your guns, my dude,” one person wrote.
“Your family seems to have a hard time respecting boundaries. They brought upon themselves your outburst and threat. It’s up to them to decide whether they want to be respectful or not,” another commented.
“Your family should certainly be listening to you when you say how uncomfortable this makes you and you wished they would stop. ‘Jokes’ aren’t jokes when they hurt. I mean, I get it, it is technically your second marriage. And maybe they did mean it in jest and good fun. But hurting someone is hurting someone. It should cease when you say it hurts you and please stop, at that point it goes from a bad joke to just taunting someone,” someone else weighed in.