A man was roasted on Reddit after declaring that he is “begging” his girlfriend to conform to societal norms in order to impress his family.
“I have a big family that’s incredibly close. We have big family dinners every few months where we all meet at my great grandfather’s estate and eat together,” he wrote. “Typically how this works is that the women go cook for the time they’re there and the men don’t. Which I am fully aware it’s sexist as hell. That being said, I am one of the youngest people in my family and my protests mean literally nothing.”
He continued on Reddit, “Some of those women choose not to cook, however this is usually met with a level of ostracizing. The women who don’t cook are wives and long term girlfriends. So they kinda already have a good family relationship doctored in.”
He explained that in the past when new partners won’t cook, it hasn’t gone well as his family will ostracize them, not speak to them and be overall rude towards them.
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“This dinner will be in two weeks and my girlfriend was asked if she would attend. Initially she said yes, which is great. I want for her to meet everyone and for everyone to get used to her being around, but when I explained to her the tradition she was understandably bothered,” he recalled. “I told her that I understood where she was coming from, however it was best for everyone if she just played along. I told her this isn’t a permanent thing and that I am only asking her to do this so that she can avoid bad treatment from the rest of the family.”
He stated that since this was her “first impression” on his family, he thought it best if they don’t make “waves.”
“She told me that it’s unacceptable and that if she has to do that she will not be going. I’ve tried to find a compromise with her on this but she won’t budge and she’s pissed at me,” he added. “She told me that if I think it’s acceptable to make her do this I’m just as bad as everyone else, while my point is that she needs to make a good first impression.”
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User’s blasted the man for not sticking up to his family for his girlfriend.
“‘Why won’t my gf abandon her sense of self-respect so that she can establish herself as a subservient woman-tool so that my sexist family won’t mentally and verbally abuse her?! She just doesn’t get it!!,'” one person mused.
Another chimed in, “You seem to be very concerned with your girlfriend making a good first impression on your family, but not at all concerned with your family making a good first impression. It reads as though you care far more that your family approve of your choice than you do that she approves of your family. That’s pretty fu–ed up and self-centered.”
“So you disagree with it, but are you in the kitchen in the meantime? Have you ever tried to go in there and help provide the labor? Or are you only ‘not sexist’ to women you want to sleep with?,” another person stated.