A woman on Reddit is giving her husband an ultimatum, he either chooses her or his friend.
“The title sounds toxic but hear us both out. I will make this as simple, short and sweet as possible. I (22F) and my husband (20M) originally met in an online game years back. I eventually went to his country to meet him in person, and we ended up married with a child. Over time, he stopped playing the game with me, stating that I was annoying, it was no longer fun, and just generally “wasn’t the same as it once was,” the woman begins.
The wife then goes on to say that her husband and this friend spend multiple hours online together and that she is bothered by the way that they interact.
“He has since met a ‘friend’, who we will call H. He spends multiple hours daily online with H in the 2 weeks since they’ve met, and i couldn’t help but be bothered by the way they interacted. The way he talks to her reminds me greatly of the way he used to talk to and about me. I’m a very jealous person, and their interactions have slowly escalated into ways i find uncomfortable, from straight up flirting, to sending each other ‘NiNi 💜’ (hearts included) texts before bed,” she shared.
“It has come to a point where i genuinely feel replaced, since we no longer have any shared hobbies, and he spends 8-12 hours a day either online, watching movies, playing games (usually with H), or out of the house with his real life friends. He sees nothing ‘wrong’ with any of it,” the woman continued.
The wife shares that her husband is naturally flirtatious and that it usually causes fights to occur between them.
“My husband is flirtatious by nature and these are symptoms of a running trend where he makes a (usually female) friend, I eventually blow up and we both end up frustrated. H just happens to be the latest example. He doesn’t understand why I’m so frustrated, and even though i know he doesn’t intentionally mean harm, it upsets me nonetheless,” she concludes before asking if she is wrong in this scenario.
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People in the comments section shared their thoughts about the situation.
“You need therapy to be able to communicate together. Either he doesn’t understand or he doesn’t care and you need to know which it is,” one person advised.
“There’s a very distinct difference to be made when talking about jealousy, namely that it’s only toxic when it’s entirely unwarranted. While obviously impossible for him to have a sexual affair through a screen, I would still very well and fully consider this cheating,” someone else shared.
“If you offer an ultimatum to someone who’s attraction to you is based mostly on the fantasy of gaming anonymously, then he might very well choose the new, more satisfying fantasy gamer. It would be better to work on what’s missing in your relationship, instead of the more satisfying replacement,” rad another comment.
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