A woman on Reddit says she refused to let her dad hold her newborn during his herpes outbreak because he had “open cold sores” on his mouth.
“My parents are visiting this weekend to meet our newborn baby. They drove over [six] hours and have been excitedly calling and texting me for days before this trip telling me how much they can’t wait to be here. When they arrived yesterday my dad had a bump starting to form on his lip. I know he gets cold sores so I ask if that was one. He responded that it was just a zit so I dropped it,” she wrote in her post.
“Today he came over with an open cold sore and asked if he would get a chance to nap with the newborn on his chest. I told him that with the cold sore I would not allow it and he dejectedly sighed that it was okay. Shortly after my toddler ran to his arms to be picked up to which I told my dad that I wasn’t comfortable with him holding her either,” she continued.
The disappointed grandfather told her he was going to “step outside for a minute while wiping tears away from his face.”
“He walked down the driveway and has been gone for close to four hours and isn’t answering his phone. My mom also seems upset with me,” the woman explained.
“Am I the a–hole for telling my dad he can’t hold my children while he has an open cold sore?” she asked Reddit.
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In the comments section, Reddit users backed the woman’s decision to prioritize her children’s health over her father’s feelings.
“You are 100% correct to protect children from the virus. It can be deadly for newborns. But he’s not wrong for being sad that it happened. Obviously, he didn’t have control over a flare-up. I try to make everyone feel better by seeing if another time soon will work for a visit. And I’d encourage your mother to encourage him to get some maintenance treatment so that it’s not an issue next time,” one user wrote.
“You did the right thing not allowing your dad to hold your kids during the flare-up. You do need to explain the reasoning to your parents and ask them to read up on the risk. It does not mean your dad can not touch the kids. He just needs to be careful during flare-ups,” another commented.