A woman on Reddit was mortified after her boyfriend ruined her work party and then made sexually suggestive comments about her sister and best friend.
“I took my boyfriend Manny with me and he ruined the night. He got mad at me for the level of intellectual intimacy that I have with some of my male co-workers. I explained that this is what happens when you spend 8 [to] 16 hours talking to team members. Nothing creepy is happening here,” she wrote.
“The get-together went as an [sic] usual non-office meeting. We exchanged funny stories and shared a few drinks. Their wives were there and because Manny isn’t familiar with my co-workers, everyone bent over backwards to make him feel welcome,” the woman continued on Reddit, adding her boyfriend made things tense and uncomfortable the whole event.
When they returned home from the party, things got even weirder.
“He asked to see pictures of my friends and family out of the blue, so I pulled pics from their social media. He said ‘your best friend is so gorgeous, I’d love for her and I to make a baby. Your sister is yummy, I wonder what she’s like in bed.’ This happened without a warning. I was completely taken by surprise. We have never joked that way and what he said was horrible and disrespectful both to them and to me,” she detailed, adding that her boyfriend eventually left following an argument about what he had said to her.
“This has hit me so hard that I got a minor chest pain (not from a real medical reason but because I wanted to cry and couldn’t). I feel very out of place right now. I’m embarrassed that someone I love would treat me like this and without provocation. I’ve been staring at the wall and not being able to sleep. He just made me feel like women like me (dedicated and who hardly wear makeup) don’t really inspire love and respect,” she continued.
Since that night, her boyfriend has been blowing up her phone, telling her that she “overreacted.”
“I only texted him that my sister is my baby and I’m protective and that my best friend is sacred to me so please f–k off. He has just hurt my self confidence. I’m thinking that if he said that, then he thinks I’m not deserving of respect. What worries me is that he was someone I trusted because he was always awesome and one of the men who’ve treated me nicer,” she explained.
However, his behavior has now made her wonder if she is doing something that makes men think it’s OK to “disrespect” her.
“We were doing fine until a few months ago, when he started poking fun at me and doing things that slowly became increasingly mortifying. I thought I was very lucky to have him as I used to work 16 hours a day for this project … and he was super understanding. This experience has left me feeling angry with myself,” the woman shared.
“He goes to the same places I go so I’m gonna have to face him, eventually. What can I do to manage my feelings of disappointment and pain while he’s around?” she concluded.
Users in the comments suggested the woman dump her disrespectful boyfriend ASAP.
“He’s FOUL. I really hope he is now your ex,” one user wrote.
“He is jealous of your success and intimidated by your intelligence. He wanted to make you feel small, he wanted to crush your self confidence because by diminishing you, he can make himself feel like the big man. Don’t give him the satisfaction. Know your worth and know you’re better off cutting this festering canker off permanently,” another commented.
“He deliberately expressed sexual interest in those closest to you to hurt you; to punish you for his insecurity about your accomplishments. Don’t let him tell you your worth,” someone else advised.