Bride Gives ‘Ultimatum’ After Frenemy Invites Friend to Wedding

A bride on Reddit is giving one of her friends an ultimatum after her frenemy invited their mutual friend to a wedding on nearly the same date.

“I’ve been called a bridezilla for this so I’m open to honest feedback. Ella and I have been friends since first grade. Ella has another childhood friend, Cam, who she’s known since kindergarten. We’re currently all 26,” the post begins.

“Cam and I were friends as kids but naturally drifted as we aged into adolescence/adulthood. We were almost always on friendly terms. Ella and I grew closer as we got older. All 3 of us attended the same college (big state school),” the bride continued.

“Ella and I lived together all 4 years, and I found that Cam became competitive with me throughout college. Like if I went on a date, Cam would ask the same guy out. When I got an internship, Cam submitted an application and asked to be considered even though the position was closed. I joined a nice gym off campus, Cam joined the same one. I babysat throughout college- Cam found some of the moms through my Facebook and messaged them offering her babysitting services,” the woman shared.

When I started dating my fiancé, long-distance at the time, Cam got his number from Ella and texted asking to meet and grab drinks. Ella is the most passive person I know. She will do whatever she is being pressured into. I’m not a pushy person, I don’t feed the need. Cam is extremely pushy and does not like to take ‘no’ for an answer,” the Reddit post said.

“Because of this, there’ve been many times growing up where Ella and I had plans, and she cancelled last minute because Cam wanted to hang with her. She’s shown me text chains where she said no to Cam 5+ times but Cam keeps pushing. Ella needs to assert actual boundaries but whatever. I value her as a person despite this and I simply stopped viewing most plans with Ella as serious with some exceptions such as a non-refundable vacation. And my wedding,” she shared.

“I’m getting married in June. Ella is a bridesmaid. Save the Dates went out a year ago. We didn’t invite Cam but she’s aware of it. Last week Ella received a Save the Date for Cam’s wedding, the day after mine on the other side of the country. Impossible to attend both,” the bride revealed.

“Ella has been desperately trying to figure out what to do. Cam asked her to be the MoH. I got a call from Ella yesterday crying that Cam’s pressuring her. Ella said for a ‘compromise’ she’ll attend my rehearsal and spend the whole day before my wedding with me, then spend my actual wedding day flying out to Cam,” the woman furthered.

“I said no. I told her it’s ultimately her choice to decide which wedding to attend, but she’s not welcome to attend my rehearsal if she’s voluntarily skipping the wedding. I reminded her that she said yes to being my bridesmaid almost a year ago and that she’s been prioritizing plans w Cam, pressure or not, over plans with me for our whole lives. I said I will understand whatever choice she makes, but I will also not be willing to continue a friendship with her if she won’t honor this commitment. Ella is distraught and begging me to reconsider,” the post concluded.

READ MORE: Mom Begs Daughter Not to Have Wedding on Anniversary of Family’s Fatal Car Crash

People in the comments section of the post shared their thoughts on the situation between the frenemies.

“At this point Ella’s spinelessness combined with Cam’s TRULY bizarre and stalker-y behavior is becoming painful and harmful to you. It’s ok to have a boundary against a friend you can’t count on,” one person said.

“The correct move here is for Ella to say ‘Sorry Cam, but it’s very short notice, and I already have plans,’ another person advised.

“Ella needs to face reality about what Cam is doing. At this point, Ella should know better and be able to see through the BS. I wouldn’t want to continue a friendship with her either if I were in your shoes,” someone else said.